Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Text me some of your sweat
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
