...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Randomize
