What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize