I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
