none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Performed a legit marriage between 2 drunk people at last call yesterday. Becoming ordained has already paid for itself.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize