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• (510): View more from California

  called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?

  (1-510): View more from California

  you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.

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• (631): View more from New York

  im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies

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• (917): View more from New York City

  and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.

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• (509): View more from Washington

  Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.

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  21 Of The Most Impressive Things Ever Seen In Porn

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• (910): View more from North Carolina

  I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test

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• (970): View more from Colorado

  I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.

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• (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.

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  19 Parents Had Epic Reactions When Catching Their Kids Being “Bad”

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (704): View more from North Carolina

  it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster

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• (941): View more from Florida

  She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?

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• (916): View more from California

  I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  I need water and some morals

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