So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
and i looked up. we had an audience...
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.