I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
Randomize
