I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
