I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
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