sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
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