My hair reeks of homosexuality.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize