I want to stick my p in your. b.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
This house was built for laser tag.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
