Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
