i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
