My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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