you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
