So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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