Just cropdusted the office
honey bunches of taint.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
