i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Randomize
