I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
