Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
