I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I currently don't understand fingers.
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
