Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category. http://tfl.nu/bs6u
  Replies (55) Good night (936) Bad night (11618)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (843): just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style. http://tfl.nu/ygfi
  Replies (8) Good night (1389) Bad night (3100)
• Favorite

  (386): View more from Florida

  after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (386): after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time. http://tfl.nu/767v
  Replies (59) Good night (36677) Bad night (1352)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends. http://tfl.nu/k3i4
  Replies (53) Good night (4940) Bad night (977)
• Favorite

  (763): View more from Minnesota

  After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (763): After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended http://tfl.nu/x97c
  Replies (10) Good night (1447) Bad night (3920)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there http://tfl.nu/tess
  Replies (3) Good night (976) Bad night (2360)
• Favorite

  (224): View more from Illinois

  Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (224): Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober http://tfl.nu/war3
  Replies (15) Good night (2319) Bad night (944)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (412): just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass http://tfl.nu/r852
  Replies (3) Good night (3551) Bad night (1111)
• Favorite

  (609): View more from New Jersey

  why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (609): why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs? http://tfl.nu/z5vs
  Replies (19) Good night (629) Bad night (1862)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now. http://tfl.nu/4pf5
  Replies (5) Good night (599) Bad night (1158)
• Favorite

  (616): View more from Michigan

  If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out

  (417): View more from Missouri

  You'd think the first few times would have been enough

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (616): If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out (417): You'd think the first few times would have been enough http://tfl.nu/z7d7
  Replies (10) Good night (708) Bad night (1553)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow. http://tfl.nu/5cxp
  Replies (4) Good night (483) Bad night (798)
• Favorite

  (712): View more from Iowa

  There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (712): There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life? http://tfl.nu/al5z
  Replies (7) Good night (423) Bad night (919)
• Favorite

  (516): View more from New York

  Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (516): Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles? http://tfl.nu/3kx7
  Replies (2) Good night (359) Bad night (654)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (414): You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities. http://tfl.nu/nk4h
  Replies (2) Good night (551) Bad night (162)

Randomize