Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
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