Tell her she can't have a vagina
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
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