Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
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