Can i not drive my cunt home
I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Randomize
