i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
