But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
