You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
