I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
