the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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