how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize
