so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I want to fling myself into the sun
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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