I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
C'mon pople!!! THursday afternoon isnot gonna drinkin itself!!!
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
