that's an acceptable place to lick
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
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