i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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