Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
This is my gift to your gina
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
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