I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize