Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
there is glitter all over my balls
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize
