Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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