Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Your mouth is God's brothel.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
Nothing says thanksgiving like acid flashbacks
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
