Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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