I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I am midnight drunk by noon
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
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