I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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