you're like a bully in the Christmas story
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
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