theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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