Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
