Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
