Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (970): View more from Colorado

  We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard

  (970): View more from Colorado

  I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock

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  (970): We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard (970): I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock http://tfl.nu/uy52
  Replies (52) Good night (628) Bad night (2299)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.

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  (610): I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace. http://tfl.nu/hmhd
  Replies (48) Good night (7696) Bad night (1156)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.

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  (615): my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap. http://tfl.nu/2c94
  Replies (27) Good night (4314) Bad night (826)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us

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  (603): stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us http://tfl.nu/v63w
  Replies (6) Good night (5108) Bad night (843)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent

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  (608): I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent http://tfl.nu/fgks
  Replies (24) Good night (4160) Bad night (912)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.

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  (412): I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is. http://tfl.nu/ejf0
  Replies (12) Good night (5191) Bad night (1357)
• Favorite

  (403): View more from Alberta, CA

  They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.

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  (403): They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside. http://tfl.nu/o1u3
  Replies (9) Good night (5512) Bad night (921)
• Favorite

  (559): View more from California

  The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.

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  (559): The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway. http://tfl.nu/e3fd
  Replies (7) Good night (2676) Bad night (871)
• Favorite

  (443): View more from Maryland

  she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.

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  (443): she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup. http://tfl.nu/y9af
  Replies (16) Good night (5711) Bad night (1079)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?

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  (310): Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children? http://tfl.nu/23ha
  Replies (12) Good night (2922) Bad night (962)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?

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  (401): he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid? http://tfl.nu/msiw
  Replies (8) Good night (2102) Bad night (699)
• Favorite

  (951): View more from California

  omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited

  (951): View more from California

  dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles

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  (951): omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited (951): dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles http://tfl.nu/4z6p
  Replies (7) Good night (1520) Bad night (710)
• Favorite

  (707): View more from California

  Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer

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  (707): Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer http://tfl.nu/jesn
  Replies (2) Good night (558) Bad night (906)
• Favorite

  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.

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  (412): Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats. http://tfl.nu/9v9s
  Replies (3) Good night (366) Bad night (474)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Oh my god I found my bf's erotica

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.

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  (270): Oh my god I found my bf's erotica (270): OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA. (270): OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA. http://tfl.nu/oils
  Replies (3) Good night (1333) Bad night (154)

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