We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
